99%

That's how often I have a good, and sometimes even great day. That other 1%...well it can bring you down. Today was one of the harder days, and I don't even know why actually. Things just seemed heavy on my heart today and a coworker (new to Oakdale) saw a picture of Jackson and we talked about him for a little bit while I showed off the pictures I had of J-man with me. I don't keep very many at school because I don't need to have 5 year olds asking me about it. Anyway...after showing him off I just couldn't get him off my mind. I came home and watched his video from the funeral and balled my eyes out. It just hits me so hard some days that he's gone forever...but with that I know he's better, but it still just hurts, and really pisses me off sometimes. Anyway...I curled up with his blanket and let it all out, and felt much better. In true Mommy form, my mother just seems to have a knack for knowing when I need something, so she had us up for dinner and YUMMY apple crisp (don't even want to talk about how many points that is!!). She didn't know today was a rough one for me, but just being with her and my Dad helps...and sitting around where Jackson use to hang out helps too. So thanks Mom...you didn't even know you were helping me out...LOVE YOU!

Anyway...I guess I just needed to vent or something. And what better place then my blog right?! Tomorrow I take 23 very loud and active students on a field trip, followed by 3 hours of working the Fall Carnival. Oh...and my blood work is back and still off, so they have changed my dosage of synthroid. I got back in 4 weeks for a retest...nothing too major. Thanks for checking in on me...please say an extra prayer, they help me on these rough days. As always, please Remember Jackson!

Nichole

And I wanted to post a special picture of him tonight, one that many have never seen. I love it...

Love You Jackson Cole!!